Ironically, it was during my search for a much deeper spiritual understanding that I was slapped around the face with a metaphorical straw. You know, the proverbial one that broke the camel’s back? Yeah, that one.
Why is it ironic? Because I thought this new spiritual version of me would be monk-like; balanced, calm and peaceful. After all, I’ve spent my whole life people-pleasing and fighting to ‘earn’ love. Do you know what I realised? The new version of me is self-assured, sassy and has a fire in her belly. She wears red lipstick, knows her worth and isn’t afraid to put herself first.
She is more balanced than she has ever been because she now has her voice. She is able to give more to others because she makes time to fill her own cup. She has the career she desired because she no longer lets people walk over her.
I’ll come back to the proverbial straw and that whole situation in another blog post, but for now I want to re-introduce myself, as well as thank you for being part of my journey.
The Old Me
Up until this very moment, this is how I would honestly describe myself: Beige.
I’ve never really spoken my mind for fear of offending someone or showing my ignorance to a situation. I don’t make jokes because I’m afraid of being un-funny or accidentally offensive. And my difficulty putting myself first has seen me scratch off anything ‘me-time’ from my schedule in order to make time for someone else. I’ve been told that I’m the person who “always sees both sides” and “has the patience of a saint” when what they really mean is that I sit on the fence and don’t have a backbone.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve fooled many people along the way, dressing up that old fence of mine. Hell, I’ve painted and decorated the fence and built a comfy-ass chair to sit on while I’m there. But there’s no escaping the fact that my peachy butt is perched in no mans land and my legs are dangling on the side of ‘being ok as long as everyone else is happy’.
‘Play it safe and you won’t get hurt’ was my motto. That’s all well and good until you get hurt so badly that you realise you’ve been hurting for a long time. Too long.
We Start Today
It’s time to pick a side, stand for something and be the person I was put on this Earth to be.
Expect tips, advice and anecdotes for all things health and wellness; from fitness and nutrition, to life coaching, mental health and chasing your dreams.
My mission is to help give you the tools to love yourself and feel worthy of all the things you desire. I hope to lead by example and can’t wait to meet so many of you along this journey.
Erin x
